Gentle Disruption

This page gives you an idea of how Gentle Disruption helps you and what we do.

Coaching as a way of asking you questions that enable you to think deeper and wider about what you want to achieve and how you could get there. The idea is that everyone of us has the resources to achieve whatever they want and might just need to find them. Coaching provides the help to find your resources and a coach also acts as a companion on your journey to wherever you want to go. This applies to individuals as well as groups, in which the found resources can benefit the whole group and the group dynamic might change to something more collaborative. The term coaching is not protected and used widely with differing meanings, i.e. some will ask leading questions, some will make suggestions as well, some will only ask open questions and some will be as non-leading as they possibly can. I belong into the latter group and would class anything that is leading as mentoring.

► What is Clean Language?

Clean Language is a method of asking questions that are as assumption-free and non-leading as possible. The “Clean” bit is that the questions by their design separate the coach’s perception of the world from the client’s and thus leaves the client free to come up with their very own way of doing things. Clean Language was originally developed by a trauma therapist David Grove based this method on two realisations: Firstly, he compared transcripts of sessions from some very good therapists and discovered patterns in what the clients of each therapists was working on, suggesting that each therapist was (unconsciously) leading their clients in a certain direction. And, secondly, he observed that clients often used metaphors to describe their traumas and that these metaphors could be used to transform the client’s trauma into something therapeutic by enabling the client to transform their metaphors.
Nowadays, Clean Language is used in a lot of different settings, like coaching, teaching, business decision making, sales, parenting etc.

► What can you help me with?

Question back: What do you want help with? What in your life, work or organisation does not work and you want it to be different? Or what is something you want to have happen (and it is not happening (enough) yet)? Examples are, how to work (you can insert learn, teach, manage, sell, parent, etc.) at your best? And what needs to happen to be at your best more of the time? How to achieve a certain goal or outcome you have in your life; How to overcome a certain barrier in your life. These examples apply to both individuals and group.

► What can you not do?

I cannot sort anything out for you, that means the change will need to come from you and you are responsible for it. I also cannot do therapy, i.e. if your problem is of traumatic or psychological nature I have not got the qualifications to help you. I will tell you, if I have the perception that this is what is happening and advise you to seek out a therapist. In group settings, I will not be able to help your organisation if the management does not stand behind the coaching and is happy to implement any changes that might come up. The way group coaching works best is in a top-down approach.

► How long does coaching go on for?

Between 3 and 6 sessions going over a period of 3 weeks to 6 months depending on what is necessary as well as convenient.

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What happens if I am not happy with your work?

I am committed to tailoring my coaching to you and your needs. If for any reason you are not happy with my work, you can terminate our relationship, just give me a minimum of 24 hours notice.

► What happens in between coaching sessions?

In order for what you have worked on in a session to get embedded into everyday life, you will have a little developmental task between each session. In most cases you will choose something yourself, or we will discuss something together. In group coaching especially, I might decide on something for everyone to work on. These task work along the line of what is the least thing you could do to get a bit closer to your outcome.

► What happens after coaching?

What might happen to you, your problem or outcome is something I cannot tell you because everyone and every situation is different. However, it will be something positive. I will contact you after a before-hand agreed time to check up on you and ask for feedback. If you have anything to share with me, I am always happy to hear about it.

What I do?

► Put you in control

This starts from asking you how you want each session/intervention to be, how you will be, over asking assumption-free questions and using your or your team’s words, to checking in whether you are still happy with what is happening. It also means, I will rarely suggest what you should do.

► Listen attentively

In a session you or your team get my full attention so that everybody and everything has a chance to speak up and be heard. That opens the way for them to show their true potential. It also ties in with putting you in control because everything your/your team say is treated with the respect it is due.

► Ask Clean Questions

The method I am working with is called Clean Language. It is based on a set of questions that are as assumption-free as possible and I will combine it with your or your team’s own words. That way your or your group stays in control of what is happening and it creates space for new thinking to emerge.

► Create space for your thoughts

Every time you say something, I will listen to it and ask a question around it. This enables you to lay your thinking processes out in space so you can have a better overview over what is happening inside you. It helps you find new stuff or see where the gaps are.

► Hold you to account

I take responsibility to make sure you or your team stay on track to your chosen outcome or check in with you whether you still want the same.

► Check on your progress

Coaching only makes sense if it leads to change. I will ask for feedback regularly and after any intervention after a before-hand agreed time to see whether my coaching was useful.